Mother Merrilyn, High-End Helen, Copy-Cat Selena

  Why are other people's blogs so inspiring sometimes? So I was surfing Blogger when suddenly I get bombarded, in the positive sense, with information regarding to people's hopes and dreams for the future. So, bring the presumptuous person that I am I will take this like a trend.

  As of now, my ideal future is one that the majority of little boys dream of, a career in the e-sports industry, except not as a player but a reporter. I suppose the first and foremost reason for this is the fact that well I always wanted to be a travelling journalist and my limited areas of interest includes food or video games. I don't mind taking over my mum's Usana career either, but before that I want to experience the joys of earning money while doing things that I enjoy.

  This isn't a future I can say out loud to my family or family friends easily because I'd be taken as seriously as a chipmunk hoola-hooping. Because to these people my aspiration doesn't count as a valid career option, I will be deemed as young and stupid for pursuing such a simplistic and 'unproductive' thing. But I want to prove these people wrong! E-sports is a growing, never-ending industry (will humans really get over the vidya? I don't think so) especially in commercial centres like the USA and China. Regarding to my identity as a girl. Women with adequate knowledge in metagame and a passion for casting won't be stuck as showgirls in skimpy costumes or players in those sad excuse of a 'female teams' relying on their pretty looks to gain fans and possibly win games. Because that's usually the role females play in this highly chauvinistic industry. Most of the female casters get so much hate because I'm going to be honest, they don't know shit. But look at us now, getting closer and closer to an egalitarian society, by the time I enter the world of e-Sports (i.e. going back to china and find a job there with my bilingual advantage) women may already have a prominent place.

  Because I'd be doing something that I love, my personal life will merge with my work life. Maybe one day I will meet my significant other (sadly my view on the subject of love is quite cynical at this stage after the whole rents ordeal) and have b00tiful babies, but I don't want those things anytime soon. I share similar views with Herupi on this topic. I'm young, let me experience da world! Let me travel and see new sights! Let me dote on my favourite gamers! I actually told my parents if I have kids I want them to bring them up until they're a manageable age because responsibility be gone amirite? They'll probably exert better influence upon my kids anyway(It's actually more complicated than that but I'd have to bring in our family business and dat shit's cray so story for another day).

  Just thinking about my potential future makes me giggly and hyped up on the inside. I'm totally ready to leave high school life behind me and enter the foreign environment that is uni and the workplace (OF GAMES KYAAAAAAAA). But who knows, maybe my hopes and dreams will change as soon as tomorrow, I'm a teenager after all.

  And before all that maybe I should just study harder and focus on my current responsibilities.

I was a bitch

  And I probably still am. What can I say? People change, some for good and some not so good. But I'd like to believe that I have become a better person. More cynical, but better nevertheless.

  You may have noticed my blog not having as many posts as it should have considering I used to blog so regularly. This is because many of my posts have been reverted back to draft because they included bitching, parents-complaining and vague stuff that might cause misunderstandings. I was reading back on those and just contemplating on all these "complaints and life sadness" I used to blog about and eventually realised that it was all me being a stupid bitchy drama llama. I was the bad person not whoeverelse I try to make villainous being the delusional person that I am.

  Anyway, ladies and gentlemen, I just republished a whole bunch.

  I'd also like to make this post an official apology to everyone I ever got into a fight with, yes, I genuinely admit that I was at fault and I hope our friendship/acquaintance will not be hindered. These people probably stopped reading this blog though, just when I really want them to read this entry of mine :(

  Yay for betterment of self?

  Let the Trial Games begin.

Interesting turn of events

  So, one week into school and I've achieved nothing. Now that doesn't mean I'm necessarily in a relaxed state, more like I'm overwhelmed with work I don't even know how to begin.

  So I won that lyrics competition after all, too bad I really don't have any need for the Nano, 50 iBucks and a friggin guitar pick punch, but I'm happy to realise that what I thought was a winning piece that didn't get submitted actually won. Woop woop. Also UTS Journalism ATAR reduced to 89.00, I HAVE HOPE GUISE.

  Now onto the sad news. I think he needs help, he's a good person but he needs help. It's one of those situations when you're the only person who realises this but can't do shit about it except living your life scared shitless and paranoid as fak everyday. Where on earth is my safe haven?

  I got my Extension 2 back along with everyone else. Let me tell you I'm pretty sure half of us left crying and devastated. I did badly as well, I slapped that smile on my face and decided that optimism is the only way to get me through. Yes I am disappointed and devastated, but being devastated and crying doesn't solve anything. I don't like it when people assume I did well because I "seem to be happy", pls.


 

Ppl pls

  It's ok bbz's your holidays are not wasted, you know what real wasted is? Doing nothing. NOTHING. NOT A SINGLE DAMNED THING. School starts on Tuesday and I've done nothing~ This holidays I'm literally just like screw this screw everyone screw all subjects I'm exhausted.

  What is HSC when I can be a hobo amirite :')

  Timetojumpinaholeforever

I'm Tired

  Despite not having done anything relatively productive this holidays it was packed to the brim with activity. I'm so exhausted I couldn't even make it to the Chinese study sesh today.

  First week had been relatively peaceful, except for the fact that my mum tries to drag me out to shop with her with every opportunity. I should have utilised this time to do some work because I realised that I pretty much wasted it chilling. On Friday I went with Jackie and QQ to study Chinese and get tutored.

  Second week was the busy one. Monday- Modern lecture and out with Irene. Unfortunately I was sick by the end of the day so I spent most of Tuesday in bed. Wednesday I went school for Modern and subsequently went Dpz' for sleepover. It was superduperubernuber fun and I stayed till noon-ish the next day after being introduced to Nova's ways. When my mum came to pick me up and just as I thought I'd finally go home she took me grocery shopping and lifting @ good old Costco. I was so tired after that I couldn't get up in the morning today. I have to cook tomorrow and catch up on HW the day after. Sigh, I wish the holidays can be longer.

  I suppose I might as well mention my humiliating experience the night before the sleepover. I wrote "Am I dreaming or are you real" to the last person I should be typing that to on Earth, never did something sound so damn wrong when you leave out the 'for' after 'you'. I told him to never talk to me again... an overreaction if you will but it was late at night, LGD lost and I had too much vodka.

The Origin of 'Pigothy'

  Even though I took half of the photos already, fashion blog will still have to come another day. Instead I grace you with the story of the origin of this 'Pigothy' name that followed me since the beginning of Steam days.

  I first came to contact with the actual pig animal when I was born awkwardly in the gap between the year of the rat and the year of the pig (before Chinese new year 1996 so I can be considered as both). Since the two alignments are so different we've decided to go with the Pig even though my age really corresponds to that of a Rat.

  Maybe it was the influence of my Chinese Zodiac but I've developed a strange sympathy for pigs since landing in Australia. I think they're super awesome and more awesomer than other animals. I always considered having a pet pig after watching Gwen Stefani's "What You Waiting For" but obviously I knew that my parents only thought about bacon.

  So on that fateful day in 2005 some random Korean streetmart lady happened to be selling pillow pets in the middle of Hurzy Westfield, mum had her eye on a plush dog but the moment I saw the pig on display I was drawn towards it and while mum negotiated prices of the dog with the shop lady I held on tightly to the pig, I wouldn't let it go and begged my mum to buy it for me. I was obsessed with that pig, I wouldn't let go of it for like 3 days and I held it to bed every night to the point of not being able to fall asleep without it on camping trips/while it's being washed.It was the first non-secondhand plush they ever bought me (in my knowledge ofc) and look at me now, still hugging onto it in the peak of my young adulthood. It's pretty much become a part of our family. Even till today I get pissed off at people who touch it without permission or even look at it with dodgy eyes. I remember screaming at a really good friend for hiding it as a joke.

 My obsession with that pig (and my growing laziness and endless pit of a stomach) rightfully earned me the nickname of 'Pig' or 'Piggy'. And so, after deciding to remain genderless on the platform of Steam I decided to change my name to 'Pigothy.' It was a name from a video of one of the first Minecrafters I've watched, Ryan, Double or Mr360Games.

  I didn't know my steam friends will take this name so seriously (since Larina just called me Waspy after my original 'waspberry' name). It was until I met Mumble did it make any serious impact because some dumb cootie named Ju thought it was my actual name and told everyone after yelling at it (original name was 'Pig' in Mumble) for so long. It's always "Goddammit Pigothy" or "OMG Pig" and soon revealing my actual name didn't matter because the stupid thing stuck, forever. A poor 17 year old high school girl is now named Pigothy, which probably derived from Timothy and is way too manly (they were surprised I was a girl and not a nubstar dude in the first place).

  It was really annoying at first, but slowly that name just stuck and became significant. The original Minecraft Pigothy got yelled at by its owner for his game freezing after riding him into the Nether. This was beyond the poor pig's control but no everybody blames him. "This is all your fault Pigothy!". And somehow that's quite familiar to me now that I go back and rewatch it because it literally echoes what I have to go through everyday on Mumble. Not really in a bad way because noone means anyone harm but yeah quite funny and cute how it's always Pigothy that gets all the 'hate', but noone ever says "Dammit Selena you're so shit".

  Recently I played LoL with a friend's friends (they're all really good at it so do you see what's coming?) and one of them questioned why Selena's IGN is 'Pigothy', my friend improvised her version of explaining but I only thought about how funny it is that nobody really knew why. And the cuter thing is the Pigothy phenomenon just happens all over again "I blame Pigothy for bot lane lost".

WHAT IS STUDY

  I think everyone are completely exhausted at this point in time, is that enough to justify my lack of productivity insofar this holidays?

  I might do an outfit blog, that's gonna be super fun. Also I still haven't written a TGG review I think it's like almost out of my head now.